in layman's terms

book: ladies and gentlemen, the bible

author: jonathan goldstein

completion date: 24/06/10

method: borrowed (andrew)

i grabbed this book in a rush this morning, knowing that i'd finish less than zero in minutes and i wanted something that would last the long commute today. it seemed like a good sized book, and i was totally disappointed by the fact that the book is about 6x9 but the type only takes up about 4x4.5. and at only 218 pages i whizzed through it so much faster than expected. on this respect i was not impressed.

however i found that the interior of the book to be very funny. it really did feel like the bible in layman's terms. the stories were direct and simple and much more relatable than i found them in the real thing. noah was a miserable old coot whose children didn't appreciate him (but then again what children do appreciate their parents lawl). and david just wanted to be loved. actually most of the stories had to do a lot with rejection and the need to be accepted by our peers. although it wasn't really a deep book, i found this regard touching.

i was not raised with religion of any sort and have never read the bible. in all likely hood, this is the closed i'm going to get unless somehow a copy slips into my ever growing stack of books to read. i found i really enjoyed these stories. especially the one about cain and abel. i never knew this story, other than cain was the first asshole and abel was selfless (and really kind of boring). also don't ever name a character cain in any tv series because they don't tend to do very well. it felt that cain's murder of his brother was more out of some screwed up curiosity as opposed to ill will. cain did not understand death in human terms, and abel was the perfect target.

i liked that all these stories focused on sibling rivalries, because it makes them way more real and relatable. none of the siblings get along and are constantly pitted against each other by their parents and god.

this book does however make a number of bible heros both human and douchy. after all, how do you think joe reacted to the 'immaculate conception'.

xo-ellebee